THE LAWS ARE DIFFERENT HERE

[SomeOldGuy]

We've been doing a lot of thinking and preparation for the >9000 Anon march, and we'd like to remind you of one thing if you're coming in from out of town for the event: LURK MOAR. Pay attention to your surroundings, and listen to the people who live in this enclave of organized insanity. D.C. is unique in the country, because it's not a state - it's a Federally administrated district, and as such it's safer to think of yourself as being on a military base (albeit with some "interesting neighborhoods") rather than in a city.

Some pointers:

1. No full-face masks or taking pictures on the Metro, and no full masks in Virginia at all (without a permit/at a costume party). If you don't mind a walk, get in touch with me over IRC or PM and ask them to help you get to the site from a different Metro stop so Scilons don't take pictures of you masking up coming up the escalator (as they love to do with us).

2. The pool is closed. You DO NOT WANT to know what's been done in the reflecting pool; so don't go in there. Not only will you be arrested, you will probably catch something awful and die. Okay, you may want to know, but you don't want it to happen to you.

3. There are bathrooms nearby. We are NOT getting the portable toilets, because there are honest-to-gawd flush toilets right nearby. DO NOT PEE IN THE BUSHES, because there are bathrooms nearby. Also, taking a leak outside is considered a sex crime in D.C. if someone else sees you. Did I mention there are bathrooms nearby?

4. There is a whole long list of what you may not do on the National Mall:

Climbing trees or cutting or collecting wood in the park is prohibited.
Gathering or possessing natural products such as fruit, nuts, blossoms or plants in the park is prohibited.
Viewing wildlife with an artificial light is prohibited (lolwut?).
Fires are prohibited. Yes, there are exceptions, but none of them larger than lighting a cigarette applies to us at the Mall. No fires or fireworks.
Public urination and defecation are prohibited - did I mention that there are bathrooms nearby?

I doubt many people will be bringing pets, but here are the rules:

Pusuant to 36 CFR 2.15 (a)(2),(5), pets are prohibited inside the Washington Monument, the Jefferson, Lincoln and World War II Memorials, Ford’s Theatre and the Petersen House, except for guide dogs for visually or hearing-impaired persons.
Pets on a leash are allowed in the Franklin Delano Roosevelt Memorial. Pets must be physically restrained at all times either by crating, caging or on a leash no more than six (6) feet in length and waste must be disposed of by placing in a plastic bag and depositing in a trash receptacle.

So you can bring your dog, but you damn well better bring baggies to pick up the poop.

Rollerblading, skateboarding, bicycling and similar activities are limited to the roadways and sidewalks outside the memorials so this is actually something you can do, as long as you're not stupid about it.

Cigarettes smokers take notice:

Smoking is prohibited in the following areas: Smoking is prohibited in all government buildings, including memorials and monuments.
Smoking is prohibited within 500 feet of any fuel storage dispensing facility (no, there are no fuel dispensing facilities within 500 feet of the march).
Smoking is prohibited in large public concentrated gatherings.

tl;dr: If you gotta smoke, go to the edge of the crowd.

Strict alcohol rules are strict:

The use, sale, or possession of alcoholic beverages is prohibited in all areas of the Park except in designated areas of approved concessions contracted by the government and assigned by the superintendent or within limited and clearly designated areas if authorized under a specific permit issued by the superintendent.

tl;dr: No booze 4 u on the Mall.

Overall tl;dr: If you have to ask if it's legal, it's probably something that will get you v& - or at least that's the safe way to bet until you can find out for sure. Now that's enough about that.

5. IF YOU GO TO THE ORG: You can not be doing so as part of the Anonymous march. You're on your own. This means no signs. You can wear your masks and flyer people, and when the police ask you "wtf r u doin?" then you tell them that you left an event at the mall and are getting food/flyering/being a tourist. Do not lie to them, though; it will go badly for you. Generally, you have to keep moving and be in a group smaller than 25 people. Better to play tourist and secondarily hand out flyers than stage a raid, otherwise the Org will call the police and it will be Fail.

6. IF YOU GO TO THE ORG, DO NOT GO INTO THE ORG. Do not go on their steps, their driveway, their little wall surrounding the org. Leave their little dog Toto alone, too. If you have any questions, some DC Anons will be in the area for most of the day, either at the Starbuck's or the Cosi near to the Org.

7. BRING MONEY. Not only will we be grateful for donations, but DC's cost of living is comparable to New York's. Besides, if you hang out near the org at the Cosi or Tomate (the latter is pricey, but has a balcony right across from the org if you feel like facefagging and being somewhat respectable looking), they will love you if you tip (scilons rarely do).

8. Have a good time. Just remember SOG's 4 rules:

1. Spread factual information about the Co$.
2. Make it more expensive to run an oppressive organization
3. Don't get v&
4. Do get lulz

Can't wait to see y'all.

[nomnom]

Also, we have public transport. Pls to be using it instead of attempting to drive in the city. You will get lost, you will end up in the ghetto and you will be shot. That is all.